Friday 21 August 2009

My in-laws and other animals



My husband's family recently reunited in the centre of our worlds which is more or less Scotland. Like many South Africans, they are dispersed all over the planet and for many people, admittedly, this might be a blessing, but not for us. We like them, and we had the whole zoo here for almost three weeks (with the exception of my father-in-law, who was here in spirit). Just to give you an idea, here follows a short introduction to the menagerie:

My mum-in-law is a badger, always scurrying about doing this or that. I was eternally grateful for the help in the house - as one tends to be with a small baby and guests - and she was just wondeful. Like a typical badger, she enjoys solitude and is fiercely protective of her family. Badgers feature frequently in English fiction, usually as a well-loved character. Well, my mum-in-law might not be in the books, but she is certainly all over them.

My husband says he is a panda. Panda?! was my shocked response. Of all the animals in the world, why a panda? Because they are mystical, endangered and extremely good looking, came his cool reply. After a bit of research on Wikipedia, he still seems un-panda like: he eats everything, is a committed partner and will hibernate if that was humanly possible. He is the picture of docility, unless irritated.

My brother-in-law, who lives in America, considers himself an eagle. He is excessively observant, but from a distance, and will swoop down on unsuspecting cuddly animals. (My cats are still fine.) He has a softer side, hidden under a well-preened exterior - preening being something of a male quirk in the family. Eagles have the unfortunate tendency to kill weaker siblings, maybe that is why my husband chose to be a panda.

My other brother-in-law is still living in South Africa, and he is a cat; either a glorious growling lion or a playful Balinese as the mood fits. Curious and fond of attention, he likes to explore and manoeuvre into the highest perch in a room or down the most impossible hole. He is also very picky about who he belongs to and not the other way around. And he digs lots of holes in the ground, but not for that!

My sister-in-law, who hails from America, is a cat, but she defnitely wants to be a pet. She shares many of the characteristics of an American shorthair: moderate temperament, not too active or too lazy, and she is a wonderful companion to live with. But don't be fooled by the calm exterior: she has a tough hide and some sharp claws.

And then there is my father-in-law, the monkey. Restless and sharp as a tack, he is entertaining and very proud of his tribe. I'm in fact grateful that he stayed in one place long enough to breed such an impressive bunch. He loves stories and food but thankfully has impeccable table and other manners.

I am avoiding myself, and my family, which is a tale for another rainy day. Which in Scotland might be later this afternoon.

Disclaimer (Thank you, Bennie, for the inspiration and outline)
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And please don't ban me from the family.